Teacher's Slang
I've been meaning to update my blog for quite some time. To be honest with you though, while teaching does take creativity, by the time I sit at the computer I'm completely out of intelligent things to say. I've used up all my words. Like now, I'm at a complete loss. I have no clear thoughts taking form right now. All I can think of is that I have nothing to say.
Now during the day, I have plenty of things to say, but I say them in teacherese. Actually I think you guys would laugh at the things I say quite frequently in class. For example, "Second Graders, it's time to turn your voices off."
Here's my top ten favorites:
1.) Keep your bottom in your chair, please.
2.) I need your eyes (sounds kind of creepy, I know)
3.) Use your "two inch" voice.
4.) That is a cool dead bat!
5.) Thanks for bringing in your dead bird.
6.) Keep all four feet on the floor, please.
7.) Give yourself a spider clap!!!
8.) You've earned 2 Bauer Bucks!!
9.) Your desk is closed for business.
10.) Give me Five!!
Yes, when I teach, I speak a completely different language. And when I come home, I don't feel like speaking at all. But, If you like clarifications on any of these terms, I'd be more than happy to explain them. Or better yet, I'd like to hear what you guys think they mean.
posted by jbau @ 9:09 PM
8 Comments:
This is our life! Funny how we talk isn't it!!!!!!!!! I am currently at a loss for words because I too know the feeling of being tired of talking, but more than that - you posted and I am so excited!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I also like how a million times a day I say, "I need your hands out of your desk" or "Hands to your side, facing front, voices off" - someday we will learn how to walk in a line - - just not sure when.
Great post Mrs. Bauer - oh and I knew all of the meanings except I don't know what a spider clap is - I think I need to know this one.
1.) Keep your bottom in your chair, I'm guessing here...
2.) Take your finger from your nose and look at the board!
3.) Quiet! I've got a headache!
4.) I'm going to have to call your Mother
5.) And yours
6.) It'd let you tip over your chair, but then you'll start crying.
7.) -pass-
8.) Here's your "good job" bribe...please let it be catching!
9.) -pass-
10.) I'm all out of Bauer Bucks!
Does Andy get Bauer bucks?
I think I have them all nailed except the "2 inch voice" - do enlighten please!
I liked Kludges take on your phrases -- especially #10 -- I think he'd make a great teacher! :)
My persistance was finally rewarded! Well done Ben Jauer! Raising Christian has prepared me for the necessity of repeating odd instructions! Think I'm good to go but for the "Spider clap." Do enlighten me please!
A spider clap is when one claps his or her thumb and index finger together. It is meant to let the children express their excitement, but in a very subdued and controlled way. I want emotion, but not too much emotion. Don't I sound like a fun teacher?
How about some links sucker. BTW.. Call of Duty!!
That picture is starting to scare me everytime I open it up and see that crazy bat - yikes - - - ok time for a new post - I keep waiting for the one you told me about - - -
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